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June 22, 2023

Rating Famous Couples

Rating Famous Couples

Everybody knows Valentine’s Day is a time for couple-related festivities and celebration of one another. Everyone can enjoy the love in the air, pink-themed paraphernalia, and yummy chocolates, but the day is extra special for those with an adored partner. And just as Valentine’s Day is recognized for its romantic spirits, there are a good amount of couples who are known by just as many. Today I will be talking about and reviewing well-known couples of history and pop-culture.

Adam and Eve


First up, we’ve got probably one of the most well known couples of all time. Whether you are religious or not, it is almost guaranteed you have heard about this pair at some point, the pair who started it all. Created by God, first there was Adam, and because he was too lonely, Eve was gifted to him. Both of them got to live in paradise, except for eating apples off one apple tree. What did they do? You guessed it: they ate from the apple tree because a naughty snake told them to do so. But enough about their shenanigans, let’s break down their relationship. First off, Adam didn’t really have like… any other options. So choosing Eve as his lady? Not all that romantic. However, he was the one to initiate the procreation process. So, that gets him a point. What about Eve? Well, she kept him company, but also made sure she wouldn’t fall as a subordinate to him, always seeking the unknown and wanting to do more with herself. Now that’s a girlboss. However, they did birth a cold-blooded murderer by the name of Cain. Cool name? Absolutely. Killing his sibling out of pure jealousy? Not so cool. 

Relationship goals: 4/10

2. Bonnie and Clyde


Next up, we’ve got the infamous lovebirds Bonnie and Clyde. Even if you don’t know what their deal was, you’re sure to have heard references to their names before. But do not fret, let me break it down. Clyde Champion Barrow and Bonnie Parker first met in 1930, when she first tried helping him escape prison, and they had been on a crime spree ever since, ranging from robbery to kidnapping, and even murder. Now, the fact that they were literally partners-in-crime? Quite adorable. I mean, the lady tried helping him bust out of prison for heaven’s sake. Although the harm and damage they caused until being shot to death in Louisiana in 1934 is not a matter to be taken lightly. Their loyalty and teamwork can be commended

Relationship goals: 5/10

3. Harley Quinn and the Joker


Harley Quinn and The Joker. Though they’ve been a pair since around the 1990s, their relationship regained popularity following the “Suicide Squad” movie which came out in 2016. Their story goes like this: Quinn started as Dr. Harleen Frances Quinzel, working as a psychologist at the Arkham Asylum, having to treat The Joker himself. Instead of fixing him, she falls in love and devotes a new version of herself to serve him. Obsessed doesn’t even begin to cut it. This love, though, is not exactly reciprocated. The Joker typically just takes advantage of Harley’s devotion to use her in his plans if he sees fit, and if not, he abuses and berates her. Sure, there’s some appeal in the costumes and crazy-obsessive love type, but the feelings don’t go much deeper than that. 

Relationship goals: 3/10 

4. Sandy Olsson and Danny Zuko


Who doesn’t love a good old classic? These two fashionistas are from the 1978 “Grease,” fitting into the cliche “good girl falls for bad boy trope,” but this relationship goes deeper than that. The two had met over the summer, not knowing anything about each other’s life at home. Thinking it was just a seasonal fling, you can bet they were shocked to find out they go to the same school! Now though it’s a cliche, I can’t help but admit it’s one many are suckers for. They’re in a cycle of denial, confusion, and longing, worried about not being able to be with each other because of their complete opposite status. However, love wins in the end… but at what cost? Yes, they get to be together, but I personally very much disliked their transformation in the end. I believe that changing themselves to be with the other person isn’t really the right thing to do- with love, it should be okay for them to remain true to themselves while also pursuing the relationship. Otherwise, I can’t say I have many complaints with their behavior towards one another. 

Relationship goals: 8/10 

5. Barry B Benson and Vanessa Bloome


HE’S LITERALLY A BEE 1/10!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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